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But They Sure Love To Stare

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So Kate left me. It hurts. But what's new?

I've been talking to AJ and it's hard. Most of me misses her like crazy, she treated me good...and I left that for what? To be in a "secret" relationship and then left harshly like always?

I want her back, and I don't. I miss being treated like a princess and I want to feel loved...but I hurt her...and I hate myself for it...

Current Location:
Megan's House.
Current Mood:
confused confused
Current Music:
Your Call - Secondhand Serenade.
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So....kate and I started to hang out again...and she asked me out the other night...and I feel like she is going to break up with my already...maybe I hung around her too much.

I didn't mean to....I just love her so much...but of course its a full moon and she's very moody and she didn't text me for over 5 hours and finally did and said she "had been thinking" which is usually her way of saying were breaking up.

I hate this, my birthday is in 2 days and instead of being a happy drunk im going to be a wasted mess....

I just need to go on pretending like everything is ok....everything is ok...

Current Location:
mclanes
Current Mood:
lonely lonely
Current Music:
i dont believe you - pink
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Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one.

So Chey asked me out today...I told her we need to wait.

I'm still very much in love with Kate...but I need to get over her...and Chey could be that person to help me...

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Im really sad right now...I just want my girlfriend back...I want my sunshine, I want to be happy, I want to be able to smile just by seeing her beautiful smile, or eyes, or face...

I don't want to be sad like this and wanting to cry...

I hate this...

Current Location:
Merlins in Binghamton
Current Mood:
sad sad
Current Music:
take a bow - rihanna
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Things I'll Never Say To You...

I'm still so in love with you
You hurt me so much
I wish you would come back
but I'm scared.

I wish you never left
I wish you would stop running away
You keep hurting me
yet I still want you with me

I can't help it
I fell in love with this beautiful girl
Who I cry over every night
And there's still that part of me that wants her here

She's moved on and I haven't
And I feel like I never will
Why do you do this to me
Why can't I leave?

I would do anything to get you back
We could run away and start a whole new life
But you've already run away
And now I'm all alone.

Katherine Elizabeth Grenier...I;ll always be in love with you, sitting here and waiting even though you've left me beat and broken...

Current Location:
Brandi's
Current Mood:
crushed crushed
Current Music:
Things I'll Never Say - Avril Lavigne
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* * *
So Kate asked me out the other day and I couldn't be happier. She is mine, I am hers. I love this girl so much. :)

Christmas is coming and she's spending it with me and I am so so so happy. She hates holidays but she told me she'd be here and that means so much to me. Like, so much. That one song is true, "All I Want For Christmas Is You..." and she is all I want, she makes me smile so much.

I really hope that what she does to me I do to her, because she put my heart in knots and my tummy in whirls and I love it... I want to make her feel loved.

10/17/10

Current Location:
My Room.
Current Mood:
loved loved
Current Music:
Happy - Nevershoutnever.
* * *
So Kate and I are kind of seeing each other again. We're not dating yet, she's waiting to ask me. She wants to make it special...

I'm pretty stressed out right now.

I got my period last night, she practically broke her ankle the other night, I have finals...

Current Location:
OCC
Current Mood:
stressed stressed
Current Music:
What's My Name - Rhianna
* * *
So I have no idea whats going on right now...

This weekend was such a good weekend other than when Kate was reading my texts with Kaye and got upset because of the night I spent in Rochester. But I told her that she's the only one I want, I love her, I don't want anyone else.

Well Kate decided that she wanted to go home kinda early on Sunday and I was a little upset cause I thought she was going to hang out for a couple hours at least, we would watch a movie, and then I'd bring her home, but she ended up going home around 3. She told me she loved me and that she had a great weekend and would see me the next day.

Well later on I found out she "wasn't talking to anyone" and I asked and Erin was like "she's just being grumpy, I'll have her call you later." Well she called and alls that Kate said was she didn't want to talk and eventually she hung up on me.

I just don't know what's going on in her head right now so tonight I'm going to the mall like I'm supposed to and I'm going to bring her something and a note and hopefully I'm still getting her... I really do love her and want to be with her. I'm not the one that leaves, I stay rooted and just want her...
Current Location:
OCC
Current Mood:
confused confused
Current Music:
Something I Said.
* * *
So kate and I are no longer...she had a mental breakdown sunday morning and left with her ex. I ended up in cpep and im heartbroken...what's so wrong with me?
Current Location:
mystic.
Current Mood:
depressed depressed
Current Music:
club music.
* * *
So I am completely in love with this amazing girl named Katherine Elizabeth Grenier. I am going to spend the rest of my life with her and I can't wait. She's awesome. <3
Current Location:
My Room.
Current Mood:
bouncy bouncy
Current Music:
Everytime We Touch - Cascada.
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